what is addiction?it doesn't goes away when u wanted it to go...and u wanted it very much...is that correct?
dunno, i feel i am addicted to something...maybe some of you might think it is about something else but i feel that it is not.that is strong and the reason i gave about my addiction is not the real one i think.
it pulls on me every single time i think of it..
it sticks on me whenever i go..
it stains my clear crystal heart with red kisses...
it is real beauty of that place, new zealand.
the people there are beautiful, their souls pure.
the scenery there is also very beautiful, with the waters clear.
i feel me looking into beautiful, crystal heart clear.
i am addicted.
to the food, people, weather,scenery...
missed there and home much.
addicted to the chocolates too...
fat person i am...
i am still addicted..
to something i would never know...
only my heart knows...
2010年1月16日星期六
new zealand n .....
new zealand.a word that makes people feel happy and also burdened.i understand that all success needs a hard process..but i feel extremely exhausted. luckily that i don't have much homework.hope i can strive through the next week.
today at school have marching.feel a bit depressed that i can't even make a simple command beautifully.and i keep making mistakes and shaking like mad in my voice. eventhough that not many ppl can hear it bt i know it myself.and i feel that my marching is getting worse...
something even worse happened and i really feel no mood after that.and i secretly have a plan going on, racing against time to plan it quick, for the sake of my bach, the bach filled with unknown future and unsecureness...
after meeting was a baju trying going on... once more felt pressured and depressed with the no-hope-of-finding-anymore-clothes-for-me feeling...wanted to cry but managed to keep it down, for its is still a long journey to go and i must be brave to fight against all odds.everyone says i am a lucky girl to go to nz and i am definitely not going to let all these people down.but i was still negativer thinking that i am sometimes somehow isolated....and i at last understood the meaning of "don't give yourself a chance to be abandoned."ok, even if everyone forget me i will try my best to shine.4 u to see haha...
the next thing in my mind is trying to form this board of meeting...duno how to start it yet but scared to make the wrong moves and make the pack of cards collapse...people before us had stacked it up nice and sturdy but a harsh move of us will damaged the whole monument...argh...i am not very positive about the meeting itself too actually... i know them too well...they only want what they want...what if no one supported me like last time? what if people say things about me?
what if they suddenly group themselves again?i really don't dare to think for i am to chicken.but i am NOT chicken...so what can i do?do all of you just threw away the thoughts and just straight away go do it? 4 1 thing i am sure about, WE DON'T GEL......so what can i do?give me some tips or lead me towards the right path, won't you?
today at school have marching.feel a bit depressed that i can't even make a simple command beautifully.and i keep making mistakes and shaking like mad in my voice. eventhough that not many ppl can hear it bt i know it myself.and i feel that my marching is getting worse...
something even worse happened and i really feel no mood after that.and i secretly have a plan going on, racing against time to plan it quick, for the sake of my bach, the bach filled with unknown future and unsecureness...
after meeting was a baju trying going on... once more felt pressured and depressed with the no-hope-of-finding-anymore-clothes-for-me feeling...wanted to cry but managed to keep it down, for its is still a long journey to go and i must be brave to fight against all odds.everyone says i am a lucky girl to go to nz and i am definitely not going to let all these people down.but i was still negativer thinking that i am sometimes somehow isolated....and i at last understood the meaning of "don't give yourself a chance to be abandoned."ok, even if everyone forget me i will try my best to shine.4 u to see haha...
the next thing in my mind is trying to form this board of meeting...duno how to start it yet but scared to make the wrong moves and make the pack of cards collapse...people before us had stacked it up nice and sturdy but a harsh move of us will damaged the whole monument...argh...i am not very positive about the meeting itself too actually... i know them too well...they only want what they want...what if no one supported me like last time? what if people say things about me?
what if they suddenly group themselves again?i really don't dare to think for i am to chicken.but i am NOT chicken...so what can i do?do all of you just threw away the thoughts and just straight away go do it? 4 1 thing i am sure about, WE DON'T GEL......so what can i do?give me some tips or lead me towards the right path, won't you?
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