回来了，感觉上好多事都变了。
最重要的是，感觉上有疏远了的关系存在着在我的生活里，让我觉得好不安。
我不知道什么造成了疏远，也抬不起脸问，变得胆小了。
你可以告诉我为什么吗？
我真得不敢问........
我害怕你说我敏感~
不过我真得有那种感觉。
哥，告诉我吧~
2010年12月8日星期三
看戏前发生的戏剧
很久都想要去看戏了。
我有在 等一个人实现诺言。
不过希望破灭。
算了吧。。。。
终于逮到机会（嘿嘿~~）
绑架我哥去看戏（要不要将夸张？！）
总之就是本来就说好要一起读书的，不过看戏比较有意思。（ >.< )
所以星期一就去看了。
讲到选戏就一肚子火，本来很期待 the social network 的推出。
明明说是二号上映，竟然只有GSC 的 signature gardens 有！
人家等到很辛苦的耶你竟然在那么远还是只有一家在上映？？？？！！！！
然后很不爽就一直跟哥投诉咯~（投诉到他有少少不爽是不是？）
然后就看看剩下的选择。。。
最能看的就是harry potter 还有 本地电影 lelio popo~
再看时间（以下是心里的斗争）
“ 怎么说都跟爸说了要去看电影，也不能太迟。不然得罪太岁就糟了~”
“诶诶，harry potter 2 1/2 hours?？！ oh my god~ 最早是一点四十分！ 看到来不是四点多了？ @.@ ”
“ LELIO POPO 十一点五十分，最早了。”
“ 不过哈里好像比较好看将~ ”
“ 不要看扁本地创作啦，kk & luke 都很好笑的嘛~ ”
“ 我比较想看 the social network!!!! ( 抓头）”
“ 看LELIO POPO 啦~ 哥都介绍咯 （其实我没听九八八，根本不知道是什么来的~）”
“ 哈里~~~~~ T^T ”
“ THE SOCIAL NETWORK !!!!! 呜~~~”
就这样过了n个小时后，哥哥问：“随便啦看什么可以。”（可能被我一直问很多问题问到不想回答 :P）
我就决定还是早点回家比较好。
到了那天，和佳纹处理完她的东西后我就踏上路途，走去parade。
佳纹住附近嘛，就说叫我走捷径，说可以快点到parade。
原来是叫我在那间拆了的小食中心里有条小路可以走过去，不用在外面晒太阳。
我找来找去，没有看见小路。
一堆烂枝烂叶和垃圾就有。
我又怕有蛇，看来看去那废墟中隐约有小路，但是又看不见一个出口.......
这样浪费了好一些时间，胡乱抱着必死的决心，闯过那堆好像有蛇的树叶。（很=.=||| 对吧？）
买票了，哥哥跟我推来推去买票，不知道我闹什么别扭啦。不过你是哥应该你去买对吧？
给钱时......
哥哥：妹，十二块。
我（发抖) :哈？（差点骂WTH）酱贵？
哥哥：不是啦，是两个人一共十二块。
我：哦.... 吓死我。（心想哥刚刚才跟我说他带十块来而已，十二块，贵死人咩？
哥哥（紧张）：妹，一人六块啊~ （此时收银员很耐心的等我的钱....）
我：哦....（抽出六张一块钱，给哥~不然他拿不到十二块不放心~）
哥哥：......（很快地把钱算一算，交给收银员。）
.......
有没有觉得有这种慢半拍的妹吓死人？还是反映跟动作很慢的妹， 令人汗颜阿~
接着走出排队行，我开始研究戏票（太久没看戏了的山芭佬~）
然后就买爆米花。我记得哥说过他从来不在看戏时买东西吃。
（还是我太贪心和贪吃？不懂得节约?太奢侈？） **哥你的一句话总发人深省....**
跟收银员说要lite 的爆米花，他竟给我原本口味的。
然后有很多事研究价钱咯。发现原本口味跟LITE 的比起来贵两块多~
很不甘心的给多了两块~
为什么那么贵？
哥说：糖起价了~
我：哦~我是低糖consumer~别的都影响不到我~
撕了票（不是"撕票"ok?是撕票~)，留下票根，哥就鄙视地说：留给你当纪念吧~
（喂喂，我知道你看很多戏，不用将看不起山芭佬的~ >.< jk jk~ )
就去找位子坐咯~选倒的位不错也~不愧是我哥啊~
我一直讲了很多很山芭佬的话~在此不多加说明~
坐下来后，
哥就说: ei, 你不是说这是原本口味的？试试看是不是甜的？
啊呜嗯，我把一块放进嘴里，顿时愣了一下。
我转过头去跟哥说：咸的！
突然两个人都 =.='''
.......
哈哈~好好玩~
待续~~~~~~
我有在 等一个人实现诺言。
不过希望破灭。
算了吧。。。。
终于逮到机会（嘿嘿~~）
绑架我哥去看戏（要不要将夸张？！）
总之就是本来就说好要一起读书的，不过看戏比较有意思。（ >.< )
所以星期一就去看了。
讲到选戏就一肚子火，本来很期待 the social network 的推出。
明明说是二号上映，竟然只有GSC 的 signature gardens 有！
人家等到很辛苦的耶你竟然在那么远还是只有一家在上映？？？？！！！！
然后很不爽就一直跟哥投诉咯~（投诉到他有少少不爽是不是？）
然后就看看剩下的选择。。。
最能看的就是harry potter 还有 本地电影 lelio popo~
再看时间（以下是心里的斗争）
“ 怎么说都跟爸说了要去看电影，也不能太迟。不然得罪太岁就糟了~”
“诶诶，harry potter 2 1/2 hours?？！ oh my god~ 最早是一点四十分！ 看到来不是四点多了？ @.@ ”
“ LELIO POPO 十一点五十分，最早了。”
“ 不过哈里好像比较好看将~ ”
“ 不要看扁本地创作啦，kk & luke 都很好笑的嘛~ ”
“ 我比较想看 the social network!!!! ( 抓头）”
“ 看LELIO POPO 啦~ 哥都介绍咯 （其实我没听九八八，根本不知道是什么来的~）”
“ 哈里~~~~~ T^T ”
“ THE SOCIAL NETWORK !!!!! 呜~~~”
就这样过了n个小时后，哥哥问：“随便啦看什么可以。”（可能被我一直问很多问题问到不想回答 :P）
我就决定还是早点回家比较好。
到了那天，和佳纹处理完她的东西后我就踏上路途，走去parade。
佳纹住附近嘛，就说叫我走捷径，说可以快点到parade。
原来是叫我在那间拆了的小食中心里有条小路可以走过去，不用在外面晒太阳。
我找来找去，没有看见小路。
一堆烂枝烂叶和垃圾就有。
我又怕有蛇，看来看去那废墟中隐约有小路，但是又看不见一个出口.......
这样浪费了好一些时间，胡乱抱着必死的决心，闯过那堆好像有蛇的树叶。（很=.=||| 对吧？）
买票了，哥哥跟我推来推去买票，不知道我闹什么别扭啦。不过你是哥应该你去买对吧？
给钱时......
哥哥：妹，十二块。
我（发抖) :哈？（差点骂WTH）酱贵？
哥哥：不是啦，是两个人一共十二块。
我：哦.... 吓死我。（心想哥刚刚才跟我说他带十块来而已，十二块，贵死人咩？
哥哥（紧张）：妹，一人六块啊~ （此时收银员很耐心的等我的钱....）
我：哦....（抽出六张一块钱，给哥~不然他拿不到十二块不放心~）
哥哥：......（很快地把钱算一算，交给收银员。）
.......
有没有觉得有这种慢半拍的妹吓死人？还是反映跟动作很慢的妹， 令人汗颜阿~
接着走出排队行，我开始研究戏票（太久没看戏了的山芭佬~）
然后就买爆米花。我记得哥说过他从来不在看戏时买东西吃。
（还是我太贪心和贪吃？不懂得节约?太奢侈？） **哥你的一句话总发人深省....**
跟收银员说要lite 的爆米花，他竟给我原本口味的。
然后有很多事研究价钱咯。发现原本口味跟LITE 的比起来贵两块多~
很不甘心的给多了两块~
为什么那么贵？
哥说：糖起价了~
我：哦~我是低糖consumer~别的都影响不到我~
撕了票（不是"撕票"ok?是撕票~)，留下票根，哥就鄙视地说：留给你当纪念吧~
（喂喂，我知道你看很多戏，不用将看不起山芭佬的~ >.< jk jk~ )
就去找位子坐咯~选倒的位不错也~不愧是我哥啊~
我一直讲了很多很山芭佬的话~在此不多加说明~
坐下来后，
哥就说: ei, 你不是说这是原本口味的？试试看是不是甜的？
啊呜嗯，我把一块放进嘴里，顿时愣了一下。
我转过头去跟哥说：咸的！
突然两个人都 =.='''
.......
哈哈~好好玩~
待续~~~~~~
2010年11月21日星期日
身为一个学生
我觉得我的求学生活，除了精彩，还有更多的无奈。
觉得你的离去后，我的生活真的就只是如此，
精彩中的无奈，常让我觉得自己到底怎么了？
狂欢后的公主，躲在角落偷偷哭泣。
所有忙碌结束后，留下的还是空虚。
办了好多活动，认识了很多新朋友，
找到不同领域的知己，知名度提高了（？！）
但是，回到家后，
冷清的四壁，
结束了一切虚幻。
把残酷的雪花，
用寒冷的风，
吹回进我的心房。
身为一个学生，
应该是快乐的。
可我不感到快乐。
前几天，听到一个朋友，
说的故事，都只是成绩分数和学科。
突然有种惆怅，感觉中四的生活，就如此可悲吗？
我们的生活，难道只剩下这些可以留念的东西吗？
朋友突然说：你不觉得还有机会专心读书很快乐吗？
嗯，得却很快乐，因为我们是为了汲取知识`扩充视野而读书。
但是如果为了分数而读，这样快乐吗？
为了奖学金，好痛苦.......
课外活动，最近让我感到很温暖。
办的活动，都让我重新变回热血青年。
我们有许多目标要前进，
也要迈向更广的新世界。
办杂志，一向都是我憧憬的工作。
办营会，绝对是我想要做的。
然而，这一切的一切，
还有百般无奈藏在里头。
处处刁难，泼人冷水。
身为一个学生，是该承受这些吧？
我想是吧~
觉得你的离去后，我的生活真的就只是如此，
精彩中的无奈，常让我觉得自己到底怎么了？
狂欢后的公主，躲在角落偷偷哭泣。
所有忙碌结束后，留下的还是空虚。
办了好多活动，认识了很多新朋友，
找到不同领域的知己，知名度提高了（？！）
但是，回到家后，
冷清的四壁，
结束了一切虚幻。
把残酷的雪花，
用寒冷的风，
吹回进我的心房。
身为一个学生，
应该是快乐的。
可我不感到快乐。
前几天，听到一个朋友，
说的故事，都只是成绩分数和学科。
突然有种惆怅，感觉中四的生活，就如此可悲吗？
我们的生活，难道只剩下这些可以留念的东西吗？
朋友突然说：你不觉得还有机会专心读书很快乐吗？
嗯，得却很快乐，因为我们是为了汲取知识`扩充视野而读书。
但是如果为了分数而读，这样快乐吗？
为了奖学金，好痛苦.......
课外活动，最近让我感到很温暖。
办的活动，都让我重新变回热血青年。
我们有许多目标要前进，
也要迈向更广的新世界。
办杂志，一向都是我憧憬的工作。
办营会，绝对是我想要做的。
然而，这一切的一切，
还有百般无奈藏在里头。
处处刁难，泼人冷水。
身为一个学生，是该承受这些吧？
我想是吧~
2010年11月1日星期一
兄妹
这是个不可思议的事件
怎么说来嘉绮一开始讲我都不相信
她一直说：阿
有个人很像你
真得很像
不喜欢做功课
很喜欢分析东西
体形也蛮像 =.= (嘉绮你什么意思？！）
我说：怎么可能？
她说：改天介绍你认识
我：哦~
过几天（星期？），不知不觉那念头又不知哪儿飘了出来
就按照嘉绮给我的名字上面子书找咯
一看就知道这人超级维护隐私（因为我也是）
就加了他
感觉上他不会接受陌生人的叻~（因为我也是！）
不过可能嘉绮有跟他讲叻？（想多多的笨蛋 == 后来发现他也是！！）
就莫名奇妙地等下去咯
结果.....
他真得有接受我（嘿嘿，有没有觉得我很不妥？讲东西都怪怪的。喂我没有暗恋他谢谢~）
他的confirmation notice在我的信箱显示
我又开始想了（这人会不会自我介绍？）
结果....
没有耶~
所以就厚着脸皮跟他讲话（chat啦）咯~
结果....( 你的果要结多少次才完啊？！）
跟他聊开了就一发不可收拾
原来他真得像我啊啊啊啊！！！！
有点像不是双胞胎的双胞胎。
喜欢的东西（打勾）
教育理念（打勾）
不喜欢的东西（打勾）
憧憬的事物（打勾）
性格（打了个勾再个小叉，因为有点出入， 就一点点）
家庭（叉，不同的世界）
......大概就这些
那天我真是傻了吧~刚考完试，那天晚上从十点半到四点~我们没间断地聊~
（不信可以自己去问他）
突然就有个想法
认了这个跟我那么投缘像魔术一样变出来的神话人物做哥哥~
（因为这世上有那么好康的事。那么好聊的人 :] ）
就有很厚脸皮得跟他开口咯
原来着位仁兄也跟我想的一样！！！！
诶我真得很兴奋，
不是兴奋他是男的（不要误会谢谢）
而是兴奋怎么会那么美好遇到一个
那么投机的
那么明白我想表达的
那么赞同及支持我的看法的
那么多共同点的
哥哥！ 嘿嘿~我真的兴奋得有点傻了 :]]]]]]]
现在让我介绍我的哥哥给你们认识
万智盛aka CAESIUM
就是我哥啦~
和他当了兄妹，没错是个对的选择
因为阿我们还没有到吵架的进度（暂时，哥注意，是暂时哈哈）
因为可以在对方身上学得更多
发掘更多新知识
很庆幸
谢谢嘉绮
谢谢哥
谢谢考完试的星期二
（有没有觉得很押韵？）
嘿嘿
怎么说来嘉绮一开始讲我都不相信
她一直说：阿
有个人很像你
真得很像
不喜欢做功课
很喜欢分析东西
体形也蛮像 =.= (嘉绮你什么意思？！）
我说：怎么可能？
她说：改天介绍你认识
我：哦~
过几天（星期？），不知不觉那念头又不知哪儿飘了出来
就按照嘉绮给我的名字上面子书找咯
一看就知道这人超级维护隐私（因为我也是）
就加了他
感觉上他不会接受陌生人的叻~（因为我也是！）
不过可能嘉绮有跟他讲叻？（想多多的笨蛋 == 后来发现他也是！！）
就莫名奇妙地等下去咯
结果.....
他真得有接受我（嘿嘿，有没有觉得我很不妥？讲东西都怪怪的。喂我没有暗恋他谢谢~）
他的confirmation notice在我的信箱显示
我又开始想了（这人会不会自我介绍？）
结果....
没有耶~
所以就厚着脸皮跟他讲话（chat啦）咯~
结果....( 你的果要结多少次才完啊？！）
跟他聊开了就一发不可收拾
原来他真得像我啊啊啊啊！！！！
有点像不是双胞胎的双胞胎。
喜欢的东西（打勾）
教育理念（打勾）
不喜欢的东西（打勾）
憧憬的事物（打勾）
性格（打了个勾再个小叉，因为有点出入， 就一点点）
家庭（叉，不同的世界）
......大概就这些
那天我真是傻了吧~刚考完试，那天晚上从十点半到四点~我们没间断地聊~
（不信可以自己去问他）
突然就有个想法
认了这个跟我那么投缘像魔术一样变出来的神话人物做哥哥~
（因为这世上有那么好康的事。那么好聊的人 :] ）
就有很厚脸皮得跟他开口咯
原来着位仁兄也跟我想的一样！！！！
诶我真得很兴奋，
不是兴奋他是男的（不要误会谢谢）
而是兴奋怎么会那么美好遇到一个
那么投机的
那么明白我想表达的
那么赞同及支持我的看法的
那么多共同点的
哥哥！ 嘿嘿~我真的兴奋得有点傻了 :]]]]]]]
现在让我介绍我的哥哥给你们认识
万智盛aka CAESIUM
就是我哥啦~
和他当了兄妹，没错是个对的选择
因为阿我们还没有到吵架的进度（暂时，哥注意，是暂时哈哈）
因为可以在对方身上学得更多
发掘更多新知识
很庆幸
谢谢嘉绮
谢谢哥
谢谢考完试的星期二
（有没有觉得很押韵？）
嘿嘿
2010年10月9日星期六
2010年10月5日星期二
让骨子起火的痛
今天上课
抄笔记时，越抄越生气。
画面涌现眼前，不是好的兆头。
眉头深锁面部肌肉紧绷，
我已经想发火。
忍着气拼命书写，
笔压越来越大，
纸张背面的三维字样越呈立体感
我突然机械地放下了笔
陷入沉默发呆状况中......
我无法忘却你在答应我甚至与我拟好的计划后
亲自在我面前撕开那张无形的契约
我无法忘却你在我面前说好的一切
却在我面前失亿装傻
我也不知道为什么
对容忍你成了必经的过道
走着走着，在你没铺平的道路磕碰跌倒
而你，却没扶我起来
因为你总说你已经没有力气再管别人
感觉很疲惫
承载情感的威尼斯已沉没在海中
它曾经是那么的美，那么的华丽
如今在波浪下长满青苔
细小的生物遮盖了往日的金碧辉煌
它真的沉了
人们曾为这美丽的国度筑起高高的堤
因为地球的升温导致海平线上升
但是没用的
它还是淹进来了
说了对不起就功德圆满
就是你的作风
明白伤害背后的原因
却是让我骨子里起火的
痛
抄笔记时，越抄越生气。
画面涌现眼前，不是好的兆头。
眉头深锁面部肌肉紧绷，
我已经想发火。
忍着气拼命书写，
笔压越来越大，
纸张背面的三维字样越呈立体感
我突然机械地放下了笔
陷入沉默发呆状况中......
我无法忘却你在答应我甚至与我拟好的计划后
亲自在我面前撕开那张无形的契约
我无法忘却你在我面前说好的一切
却在我面前失亿装傻
我也不知道为什么
对容忍你成了必经的过道
走着走着，在你没铺平的道路磕碰跌倒
而你，却没扶我起来
因为你总说你已经没有力气再管别人
感觉很疲惫
承载情感的威尼斯已沉没在海中
它曾经是那么的美，那么的华丽
如今在波浪下长满青苔
细小的生物遮盖了往日的金碧辉煌
它真的沉了
人们曾为这美丽的国度筑起高高的堤
因为地球的升温导致海平线上升
但是没用的
它还是淹进来了
说了对不起就功德圆满
就是你的作风
明白伤害背后的原因
却是让我骨子里起火的
痛
2010年9月25日星期六
新希望？
任何人都可能觉得梁洁瑜很怪，很古板，很白痴，很伤人......
任何人都可以觉得梁洁瑜很真诚，很搞笑，很理解，很乖......
我在为自己打造新形象（不过觉得其实没有怎样变到）......
反而变本加厉？！
...
...
...
...
有时我真的会很呆
但是有时就嘴快得让人吃惊，爆笑，错愕等等惊喜（有惊也有喜）==
很多新的目标让我无从选择
我想做太多事
但也不想就此入错行或嫁错郎（引用是用来增加效果而已，非真有此意）
目前的工作都让人跃跃一试
工作伙伴也很让人觉得愉快
但对那渺茫的未来有丁点那么害怕
我对自己很有信心
如果被放入池子里我一定游得很自在（因为我是鱼，记得！）
如果放在陆地上我也可以用肺呼吸（因为我也是人，这点更要记得！）
所以希望未灭~
前进的动力就像家里新的，开着五号的风扇那样有劲儿
只是希望不要转到一半就掉下来才好
你们对我有信心吗？
任何人都可以觉得梁洁瑜很真诚，很搞笑，很理解，很乖......
我在为自己打造新形象（不过觉得其实没有怎样变到）......
反而变本加厉？！
...
...
...
...
有时我真的会很呆
但是有时就嘴快得让人吃惊，爆笑，错愕等等惊喜（有惊也有喜）==
很多新的目标让我无从选择
我想做太多事
但也不想就此入错行或嫁错郎（引用是用来增加效果而已，非真有此意）
目前的工作都让人跃跃一试
工作伙伴也很让人觉得愉快
但对那渺茫的未来有丁点那么害怕
我对自己很有信心
如果被放入池子里我一定游得很自在（因为我是鱼，记得！）
如果放在陆地上我也可以用肺呼吸（因为我也是人，这点更要记得！）
所以希望未灭~
前进的动力就像家里新的，开着五号的风扇那样有劲儿
只是希望不要转到一半就掉下来才好
你们对我有信心吗？
真的~很颓废~
最近都发现自己很颓废
可能朋友都觉得我比以前
更健谈
更疯
更八卦
(更胖？！) =.=|||
其实我不开心。。
我每天都会跟别人吵架（因为矛盾之故）
我每天都会不做功课（这点我很内疚）
我每天都很早睡觉（早睡早起身体好）
...........................................
发现自己一直想伸出手来抓回一点曾经错过的时刻
把我忽略掉的重新找回来
不过自己把自己推进了烂泥坑
我开始对功课感到厌倦.....
不知道为什么会那样想，
不过人因梦想而伟大已经开始在我心中萌芽
开始做不平凡的梦
他走了之后我发现自己会有更大的发展空间
创意的思维持续不断的涌出
对着死板的东西会厌恶
我要更多
因为我没有你的束缚
从前被我赶走的东西
我要统统抓回来......
怎么说呢？
过了一段时日
我会累
疯狂了两个星期沉醉在自我满足中
我患了嗜睡症......
真的~很颓废~
可能朋友都觉得我比以前
更健谈
更疯
更八卦
(更胖？！) =.=|||
其实我不开心。。
我每天都会跟别人吵架（因为矛盾之故）
我每天都会不做功课（这点我很内疚）
我每天都很早睡觉（早睡早起身体好）
...........................................
发现自己一直想伸出手来抓回一点曾经错过的时刻
把我忽略掉的重新找回来
不过自己把自己推进了烂泥坑
我开始对功课感到厌倦.....
不知道为什么会那样想，
不过人因梦想而伟大已经开始在我心中萌芽
开始做不平凡的梦
他走了之后我发现自己会有更大的发展空间
创意的思维持续不断的涌出
对着死板的东西会厌恶
我要更多
因为我没有你的束缚
从前被我赶走的东西
我要统统抓回来......
怎么说呢？
过了一段时日
我会累
疯狂了两个星期沉醉在自我满足中
我患了嗜睡症......
真的~很颓废~
2010年8月31日星期二
心碎
是的，我最近真得很不好。我很压力。我很忙。我很难过。我很气馁。我很累。我很生气。全部最难过让人不好受最负面的情绪都像我冲来。没有你在身边就像没有了水，仅靠着身体内的水分，你留下来的回忆，存活下去。我不明白自己犯了什么罪，要来换的今天这样的成果。使我没有努力吗？还是我被你骗了？
你把我删了，把我隔在你的世界之外。诶，那个户口是我帮你开得耶！我才是创始人，你现在利用它来对付我！
你一直说：不是我想要的。。。
我说：那当我告诉你别这样要听我说时，你的耳朵去了哪里？
你说：不要说了。你的语气可不可以好一点？我很烦~
我说：是你不理我得耶！
你不说话了。。。
不是说是朋友吗？你真得很过分。。。你欠我一千万个道歉！我真的没有看过像你那么固执那么过分那么不通人情的家伙！
不要再说我过分，使你先对不起我的！
我宁可相信你以前都只是在骗我。。。
我不会再活在回忆里。。。
哼！
你把我删了，把我隔在你的世界之外。诶，那个户口是我帮你开得耶！我才是创始人，你现在利用它来对付我！
你一直说：不是我想要的。。。
我说：那当我告诉你别这样要听我说时，你的耳朵去了哪里？
你说：不要说了。你的语气可不可以好一点？我很烦~
我说：是你不理我得耶！
你不说话了。。。
不是说是朋友吗？你真得很过分。。。你欠我一千万个道歉！我真的没有看过像你那么固执那么过分那么不通人情的家伙！
不要再说我过分，使你先对不起我的！
我宁可相信你以前都只是在骗我。。。
我不会再活在回忆里。。。
哼！
2010年5月17日星期一
today
it was a very very long time since i updated my blog... feel so guilty when i am blaming ppl for nt updating their blog... haha...
最近生活都挺“精彩”的。辩论变成了糊里糊涂的最佳辩员，然后结果是因为我没有看稿！
真是傻傻的。。。什么烂臭辩员啊？自己都觉得很好笑~不过就遇到了以前小学死对头的黄汉杰，
说话没以前那么顺了，不过也可能不是用自己母语的关系吧？那几天的训练简直让我吃尽了苦头，
最后也有点后悔进了国语国会式辩论。。。有点挺好的事，我叫了新的朋友哦！ 谢谢你的支持哦学姐^^诶，含饴弄孙的人，你也很不赖哦。。。这场比赛我们输在了内容，因为形式搞得有点混乱，大家也只是来玩玩。不过气势上绝对是排山倒海之势因为对方辩友已经被我们吓到口齿不清说话结巴慌乱发呆。。。（只字不提己方。。。）
接下来发生的大件事就是我发现了老师也戴着一个非常厚的面具！简直就不是常人所能接受的。。。这种新闻出现在报章上看了让人简直就是让人觉得不可原谅！真是的，你不要以为嘻嘻哈哈那样骗人我就不知道你干了什么。我非常清楚你是怎么把她毁掉的！咬牙切齿的想要报仇，等我把倚天剑屠龙刀弄到手时你就知道糟糕了， 龙~我现在每时每刻都在诅咒你，被折磨得死去活来！哈哈哈。。。
前天去了dr公园站岗去了。大伙儿都说闷到半条命。我很精神的再看帅气的戴棒球帽的选手打棒球！哎哟，真是太帅太有型了。。。不过当时心情很糟，根本都不知道为什么。。。我很想知道为什么会发生那种事。
昨天，敏文坐过来，我让她把她的事告诉我。我希望他不会让自己太难过。。。他哭起来了，而且很伤心。正当我以为他只是因为哭而喘不过气来时，发现他开始有哮喘的症状。而且情况挺糟的。我什么都不能做，只能安慰她给他指示要稳着气喘。大家都乱成一团糟。敏文这样持续了一个小时，情况好好坏坏。我一直都在身边陪着她。我，真得挺难过的。
被人训斥了，处事的方法不够妥当，很容易紧张慌乱，不懂得维持秩序， 不听指示。太多太多的事情要学习。。。觉得很惭愧。到最后竟变成我原来是导致敏文气喘的人！ 难过+生气+失望+惭愧+羞耻+懊恼=梁洁瑜
不是有人说不能用红色写自己的名字的吗？算了，我不是迷信的人。
这就是这几天的我.我这几天非常难过。
难道，我除了做过那些那么令人难过的事，我什么都没有做了吗？我只干了那些事？我什么都没帮到你？我。。一点都没带给你快乐？你不会再看得见。
最近生活都挺“精彩”的。辩论变成了糊里糊涂的最佳辩员，然后结果是因为我没有看稿！
真是傻傻的。。。什么烂臭辩员啊？自己都觉得很好笑~不过就遇到了以前小学死对头的黄汉杰，
说话没以前那么顺了，不过也可能不是用自己母语的关系吧？那几天的训练简直让我吃尽了苦头，
最后也有点后悔进了国语国会式辩论。。。有点挺好的事，我叫了新的朋友哦！ 谢谢你的支持哦学姐^^诶，含饴弄孙的人，你也很不赖哦。。。这场比赛我们输在了内容，因为形式搞得有点混乱，大家也只是来玩玩。不过气势上绝对是排山倒海之势因为对方辩友已经被我们吓到口齿不清说话结巴慌乱发呆。。。（只字不提己方。。。）
接下来发生的大件事就是我发现了老师也戴着一个非常厚的面具！简直就不是常人所能接受的。。。这种新闻出现在报章上看了让人简直就是让人觉得不可原谅！真是的，你不要以为嘻嘻哈哈那样骗人我就不知道你干了什么。我非常清楚你是怎么把她毁掉的！咬牙切齿的想要报仇，等我把倚天剑屠龙刀弄到手时你就知道糟糕了， 龙~我现在每时每刻都在诅咒你，被折磨得死去活来！哈哈哈。。。
前天去了dr公园站岗去了。大伙儿都说闷到半条命。我很精神的再看帅气的戴棒球帽的选手打棒球！哎哟，真是太帅太有型了。。。不过当时心情很糟，根本都不知道为什么。。。我很想知道为什么会发生那种事。
昨天，敏文坐过来，我让她把她的事告诉我。我希望他不会让自己太难过。。。他哭起来了，而且很伤心。正当我以为他只是因为哭而喘不过气来时，发现他开始有哮喘的症状。而且情况挺糟的。我什么都不能做，只能安慰她给他指示要稳着气喘。大家都乱成一团糟。敏文这样持续了一个小时，情况好好坏坏。我一直都在身边陪着她。我，真得挺难过的。
被人训斥了，处事的方法不够妥当，很容易紧张慌乱，不懂得维持秩序， 不听指示。太多太多的事情要学习。。。觉得很惭愧。到最后竟变成我原来是导致敏文气喘的人！ 难过+生气+失望+惭愧+羞耻+懊恼=梁洁瑜
不是有人说不能用红色写自己的名字的吗？算了，我不是迷信的人。
这就是这几天的我.我这几天非常难过。
难道，我除了做过那些那么令人难过的事，我什么都没有做了吗？我只干了那些事？我什么都没帮到你？我。。一点都没带给你快乐？你不会再看得见。
2010年4月29日星期四
waking up,dabte's over!!!!
these days i've been working out for this debate. the end product sucks....
but there is a thing that i am not so sad about is........
HAHA, WE THOUGHT THEY WERE MUCH MORE BETTER THAN US BEFORE THE COMPETITION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i fall asleep at about 8 something and woke up now about 1.10 am....
feeling dreadful and wanna go back to sleep again....
i have tons of homework waiting for me to finish....
i have to apologize to someone....
i have to pack up my things...
i have to de....
oops...the debate is over dy.....
hahaha........
missed you much mummy.....
hope ya won't be mad at me for waking uo this early....
but there is a thing that i am not so sad about is........
HAHA, WE THOUGHT THEY WERE MUCH MORE BETTER THAN US BEFORE THE COMPETITION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i fall asleep at about 8 something and woke up now about 1.10 am....
feeling dreadful and wanna go back to sleep again....
i have tons of homework waiting for me to finish....
i have to apologize to someone....
i have to pack up my things...
i have to de....
oops...the debate is over dy.....
hahaha........
missed you much mummy.....
hope ya won't be mad at me for waking uo this early....
2010年4月25日星期日
feeling cherished...
i love it today...between the two of us lets just hush it for ourselves....
meaningful and significant was just the two words that could describe my day...
perfect!
phrase of the day:do it, while you still can..
meaningful and significant was just the two words that could describe my day...
perfect!
phrase of the day:do it, while you still can..
2010年4月19日星期一
birthday..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU................................................
gloominess....
tired, stress and homework never goes away even on your birthday...after this significant sweet sixteen indicates the worst thing ever going to happen....on 5th of may onwards......dying.....whole lotta people....
i wished i am going back to fifteen...where it is the sweetest moments of my life...i love that year....dearly...best year ever...i am totally obsessed in what happened last year and was still beaming proud in it...
there are pros and cons for growing older...of course i get to touch the car maybe have the family car as my own...which is not a bad option... *winks*i have more knowledge and of course more respect from the others.....but i can't really have a break if i wanted more achievements....
in form 3 you can just laze about and do everything passionately whenever you can....
in form 4 there will be something striking you from no where and you have to put down everything at once....
maybe i don't want a sweet sixteen....i want my fun fifteen back in my arms....can i?
gloominess....
tired, stress and homework never goes away even on your birthday...after this significant sweet sixteen indicates the worst thing ever going to happen....on 5th of may onwards......dying.....whole lotta people....
i wished i am going back to fifteen...where it is the sweetest moments of my life...i love that year....dearly...best year ever...i am totally obsessed in what happened last year and was still beaming proud in it...
there are pros and cons for growing older...of course i get to touch the car maybe have the family car as my own...which is not a bad option... *winks*i have more knowledge and of course more respect from the others.....but i can't really have a break if i wanted more achievements....
in form 3 you can just laze about and do everything passionately whenever you can....
in form 4 there will be something striking you from no where and you have to put down everything at once....
maybe i don't want a sweet sixteen....i want my fun fifteen back in my arms....can i?
2010年4月16日星期五
stressed out
its really tough these days...i can't picture it months ago and now it has come to me...definitely i know who is more suitable but i couldn't say more because you need people to support you.thank you for supporting me.we all have a long way to learn but time is ticking and i really felt that there is no time for me to breathe and relax.i am very sorry that i let you all down with my results but i had confidence in me while doing the test.it was absolutely shocking.
i totally don't have confidence in people.it doesn't mean i dun trust you that type of confidence.its i dun trust myself in understanding you.people do change as i can see these days.i don't know whether you will be changing the next second or the next day.i just refuse to torture me with these.i can see that you all are very concerned especially this season and i haven't done my best to show out what do i have.i believe in myself but in the same time i just can't bear to be bold.i care for my face really.and when people are totally sensitive it could be out pf control sometimes.
no talking behind backs please...
and what i think i done a quite satisfying job and with all the mistakes i have done i believe i am more careful now.i remember what i have to do.all the things i can't achieve can't come back even i work hard. sometimes just let it be.we all have our circumstances and i did not plead you to understand me.i've done it and i hope you see my work in it.
weaknesses are to be pointed out and to be shared to be a better person.for this i sincerely thank all of you who had done that. whether i am really din cope with my emotions that time or i accept it whole heartedly.i thank you after reviewing everything that helped me, of course.
i try my best as everything has a twist unexpectedly at the end.no one can predict what will happen the next.i believe there is miracle in me and i know i have to potential and i am the person to do it.i just don't know when and where.
p.s. i know you've been a pain in my back and i just can't get you out.i will just allow myself to blend in and accept you as the part of my life.i will try my very best to tolerate with your behaviour.i might be very generous but i also might be very possesive at times.i won't allow you to do anything that is out of my control.beware that you will be banned if you do that.i keep your face for YOU.
last phrase for the day: smile to face the consequences
i totally don't have confidence in people.it doesn't mean i dun trust you that type of confidence.its i dun trust myself in understanding you.people do change as i can see these days.i don't know whether you will be changing the next second or the next day.i just refuse to torture me with these.i can see that you all are very concerned especially this season and i haven't done my best to show out what do i have.i believe in myself but in the same time i just can't bear to be bold.i care for my face really.and when people are totally sensitive it could be out pf control sometimes.
no talking behind backs please...
and what i think i done a quite satisfying job and with all the mistakes i have done i believe i am more careful now.i remember what i have to do.all the things i can't achieve can't come back even i work hard. sometimes just let it be.we all have our circumstances and i did not plead you to understand me.i've done it and i hope you see my work in it.
weaknesses are to be pointed out and to be shared to be a better person.for this i sincerely thank all of you who had done that. whether i am really din cope with my emotions that time or i accept it whole heartedly.i thank you after reviewing everything that helped me, of course.
i try my best as everything has a twist unexpectedly at the end.no one can predict what will happen the next.i believe there is miracle in me and i know i have to potential and i am the person to do it.i just don't know when and where.
p.s. i know you've been a pain in my back and i just can't get you out.i will just allow myself to blend in and accept you as the part of my life.i will try my very best to tolerate with your behaviour.i might be very generous but i also might be very possesive at times.i won't allow you to do anything that is out of my control.beware that you will be banned if you do that.i keep your face for YOU.
last phrase for the day: smile to face the consequences
2010年4月12日星期一
the coming of my journey to new zealand
dear readers, i am going to start my nz journal very soon...something happened recently put my brains fresh back into the wonderful memories of it...hope to give you the best description of the magnificent experience i had in nz...
to be continued....
2010年3月28日星期日
不让我吃就算了。。。
刚打完三个月的财务管理报告书，累得睡了两个小时半，错过了我的“三菜一汤”。。。
不是晚餐哦，使ntv7的节目。但是同时我真的错过了我家里的三菜一汤。
只剩饭和汤了。。。而且汤是甜汤。。。粉葛杞子红枣汤。。。饭~软糯软糯的，唉。。。
爸说：今天别吃了，喝汤算了。。
我说：炒个蛋炒饭也行啊。。。
妈说：你不知道炒个饭要用很多油吗？你的身材都这样了你还要吃那么高热量的东西。。。
我说：好啦不吃啦，要每次这样对我人身攻击吗？
姐说：你拿那个汤捞饭就吃了吧。。。
我说：我不想吃这样的饭啦，一天下来都累死了午餐也没吃多少，全身酸痛无力还要逼我吃我不喜欢吃的东西。。。
爸说：你的身材这样你就不要吃饭了，喝汤就行了。。。
我大喊：我不吃啦！平时就不想吃的时候你们就逼我吃东西，我现在很想吃些像样的东西你们又叫我不要吃！什么错的时间做错的东西？
不让我吃就算了，我不想吃了。。。。
不是晚餐哦，使ntv7的节目。但是同时我真的错过了我家里的三菜一汤。
只剩饭和汤了。。。而且汤是甜汤。。。粉葛杞子红枣汤。。。饭~软糯软糯的，唉。。。
爸说：今天别吃了，喝汤算了。。
我说：炒个蛋炒饭也行啊。。。
妈说：你不知道炒个饭要用很多油吗？你的身材都这样了你还要吃那么高热量的东西。。。
我说：好啦不吃啦，要每次这样对我人身攻击吗？
姐说：你拿那个汤捞饭就吃了吧。。。
我说：我不想吃这样的饭啦，一天下来都累死了午餐也没吃多少，全身酸痛无力还要逼我吃我不喜欢吃的东西。。。
爸说：你的身材这样你就不要吃饭了，喝汤就行了。。。
我大喊：我不吃啦！平时就不想吃的时候你们就逼我吃东西，我现在很想吃些像样的东西你们又叫我不要吃！什么错的时间做错的东西？
不让我吃就算了，我不想吃了。。。。
2010年3月23日星期二
jieyu, you must be tough...
"i've lost my friend..."
"but you still have be tough to face it.no big deal ok?"
"it is a big deal..."
"no, it's not, unless you take it seriously and stubbornly..."
"i won't get over it..."
"you will....it will go away quite soon"
"i wished i never looked at it and comment anything..."
"ya, now you know you could never be frank at anything..."
"i guess i had my punishment for that.."
"you sure did..."
"but you still have be tough to face it.no big deal ok?"
"it is a big deal..."
"no, it's not, unless you take it seriously and stubbornly..."
"i won't get over it..."
"you will....it will go away quite soon"
"i wished i never looked at it and comment anything..."
"ya, now you know you could never be frank at anything..."
"i guess i had my punishment for that.."
"you sure did..."
2010年3月14日星期日
competition 13/14 of march
i couldn't help with my eyes watering at edges...for the 1st time i saw our team in the competition i feel very proud of them.unexperienced and young, no one to guide them or to comfort them.they were alone in the middle of the scene.they did brave and calm.they couldn't have helped it because time is always insufficient.they were just 1st timers and some had even less practising.they showed courage and i just felt sorry for not being able to let them feel secure with what others think of them.i will always be in the team with you all...you all had improved in leaps and bounds and you can improve more.i have faith in you.don't feel sad for failure,you all must 化悲愤为力量。i will be with you all the time.i can handle the blame.
number 5's,don't feel isolated.it is a time for you to learn and in the end you may find you've learn't more than you've thought.it is just that 1234 are doing hands on and you are spectating their mistakes and etc.do you know that 旁观者清？
i summarized my feelings into tears.you've all worked hard.and yet things might go wrong.it is okay.we will strive this together.we want to see you all succeed.for you, yourself and us.and people sometimes just didn't show their expressions on their faces.don't misunderstand them.just forget about it and it will be ok.
number 5's,don't feel isolated.it is a time for you to learn and in the end you may find you've learn't more than you've thought.it is just that 1234 are doing hands on and you are spectating their mistakes and etc.do you know that 旁观者清？
i summarized my feelings into tears.you've all worked hard.and yet things might go wrong.it is okay.we will strive this together.we want to see you all succeed.for you, yourself and us.and people sometimes just didn't show their expressions on their faces.don't misunderstand them.just forget about it and it will be ok.
2010年3月11日星期四
yay!
school is over at last....hols coming... and the big day!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
happy... went to parade and came back home... going to someone's house....excited n worried ...
nothing to worry de lar....
maybe you should take more precautions....
there is no need to stress urself out this....
being careful is not wrong...
sigh....
then i guess i'll still live in the two way talking until the day after tomorow ends....
happy... went to parade and came back home... going to someone's house....excited n worried ...
nothing to worry de lar....
maybe you should take more precautions....
there is no need to stress urself out this....
being careful is not wrong...
sigh....
then i guess i'll still live in the two way talking until the day after tomorow ends....
2010年3月8日星期一
camp!!!!!!!
i am so excited about camp... really! it makes me so happy when it is time to gather with my mates again and have training together...it's our turn to organize it this year and i hopefully wished that my mates and i will organize a very good camp...
there is sooo much things to do and i can't wait for our meeting deciding what to do and what makes this camp special...i just can't wait for exams to finish... i am already looking at the booklets and have wild ideas running in and out of my brain....now i feel that studies are so boring to look at even they are important...i used to find studies interesting at the fact i always learn new things from studies but now doing hands-on on something else is even more thrilling and exciting and satisfiying...
i am waiting for the camp...i am waiting....
there is sooo much things to do and i can't wait for our meeting deciding what to do and what makes this camp special...i just can't wait for exams to finish... i am already looking at the booklets and have wild ideas running in and out of my brain....now i feel that studies are so boring to look at even they are important...i used to find studies interesting at the fact i always learn new things from studies but now doing hands-on on something else is even more thrilling and exciting and satisfiying...
i am waiting for the camp...i am waiting....
2010年3月4日星期四
popularity
i have some issues on this.... don't know whether it is suitable to be posted on blog anot...too many dangerous people around already...argh!!!!!!!! kenot trust them de....
1st... popularity of my friend...
feel small when standing beside her.... but all of a sudden i am blur on what her fans like about her...so why do they admire her? no sense.....two eyes one nose two ears one mouth... talking oso ben ben di, walking kk di, everytime dunno what to do pupils become very big thats all i know she is good at....but somehow her popularity among juniors makes me feel.....creepy.... is it ok to be popular?
2nd... my status for the time being...
supporting rates went down... not able to tell you what the situation is but it is mostly politics as you can see...(supporting rates...)just didn't know whether the people who said support me realy support me anot...too many fakes.... do we have to face a lot of fakes in these situations?
3rd...the population of my society is increasing....
oh no!!!!! this is supposed to be the most hard thing to deal with ever...i din wish that the population will decrease but think of the work had to be done.....
issues to deal with.....
drives people insane...
when are we going...
to achieve and grace....
1st... popularity of my friend...
feel small when standing beside her.... but all of a sudden i am blur on what her fans like about her...so why do they admire her? no sense.....two eyes one nose two ears one mouth... talking oso ben ben di, walking kk di, everytime dunno what to do pupils become very big thats all i know she is good at....but somehow her popularity among juniors makes me feel.....creepy.... is it ok to be popular?
2nd... my status for the time being...
supporting rates went down... not able to tell you what the situation is but it is mostly politics as you can see...(supporting rates...)just didn't know whether the people who said support me realy support me anot...too many fakes.... do we have to face a lot of fakes in these situations?
3rd...the population of my society is increasing....
oh no!!!!! this is supposed to be the most hard thing to deal with ever...i din wish that the population will decrease but think of the work had to be done.....
issues to deal with.....
drives people insane...
when are we going...
to achieve and grace....
2010年2月27日星期六
im sorry i din make it...
felt that i am talking crap in the previous posts. but so what? thats what i feel. nothing wrong.
i'm sorry i din make it.but i will continue to learn for sure.just felt weird again.
that may be a relief. that maybe a burden. that maybe positive to look at but it's negative side is also intimidating. aim high, but with no expectations. is that correct?i don't know. i tried hard to force back tears while trying to answer the phone. is that THAT difficult? it's just small matter.
i really don't mind.
really?
yes.which has a no written on its back.
i'm sorry i din make it.but i will continue to learn for sure.just felt weird again.
that may be a relief. that maybe a burden. that maybe positive to look at but it's negative side is also intimidating. aim high, but with no expectations. is that correct?i don't know. i tried hard to force back tears while trying to answer the phone. is that THAT difficult? it's just small matter.
i really don't mind.
really?
yes.which has a no written on its back.
2010年2月26日星期五
obstacles
there are many obstacles throughout our journey. we tend to make stupid mistakes when it comes to the important part. guess what? we still will make it to the end.even the process maybe painful, hilarious or depressing. we undergo it many times and we become -- painless....
its too painful to hear something that makes you feel its not worth it.it's too hard to let go before you reach the real junction.and it feels so bad seeing someone so good leaving.its....a very sourish taste.....
face that obstacle or not? take this chance or not? sometimes it is also not for you to decide.
there is too many factors... too many, too many....
its too painful to hear something that makes you feel its not worth it.it's too hard to let go before you reach the real junction.and it feels so bad seeing someone so good leaving.its....a very sourish taste.....
face that obstacle or not? take this chance or not? sometimes it is also not for you to decide.
there is too many factors... too many, too many....
2010年2月22日星期一
2010年2月19日星期五
stand up
stand up, is a pose as easy as ABC for most of the people.look around us, who can't stand up easily without other's help? but there is some people who have disabilities who limited their movement, and therefore they can't stand.
there is one story i've seen before.one man, without legs and arms, lived independently. it was on tv and on video clips to encourage people to be strong to be tough to learn to withstand the storms.
they can stand up,so can we.
easily we can stand, so when we cannot stand we are just finding a reason not to stand. others who cannot stand tried very hard just to stand. if they can, so can we.
never give up easily on yourself. you are unique and therefore you can control what you want.there will always be friends who support you all the way. don't let them down.
friend, regards to you. you shall stand. so shall we stand with you.
ALTOGETHER, WE STAND.
there is one story i've seen before.one man, without legs and arms, lived independently. it was on tv and on video clips to encourage people to be strong to be tough to learn to withstand the storms.
they can stand up,so can we.
easily we can stand, so when we cannot stand we are just finding a reason not to stand. others who cannot stand tried very hard just to stand. if they can, so can we.
never give up easily on yourself. you are unique and therefore you can control what you want.there will always be friends who support you all the way. don't let them down.
friend, regards to you. you shall stand. so shall we stand with you.
ALTOGETHER, WE STAND.
2010年2月17日星期三
support 4 u^^
i definitely support my friends all the time.so just go along your principles,nothing is wrong.sometimes we can't care too much about others while we ourselves are struggling with our own business.
friends have to support friends. if not what are friends for?
just found out that sometimes things are not what we've seen are.cause i am doing the 名句精华。
横看成岭侧成峰，远近高低各不同。不识庐山真面目，只缘身在此山中。
this i guess you all know what it means.lots of people can only see one piece of the mountain when they are inside the mountain.from different aspects we see things differently too.one same mountain, thousands and millions of adjective phrases.it is no control of it.everyone can be correct and wrong at the same time.it is not definite.
whatever you say, i support you.anything i don't agree, i tell you from my different perspective.
that's me my friend.hope you can get it^^
friends have to support friends. if not what are friends for?
just found out that sometimes things are not what we've seen are.cause i am doing the 名句精华。
横看成岭侧成峰，远近高低各不同。不识庐山真面目，只缘身在此山中。
this i guess you all know what it means.lots of people can only see one piece of the mountain when they are inside the mountain.from different aspects we see things differently too.one same mountain, thousands and millions of adjective phrases.it is no control of it.everyone can be correct and wrong at the same time.it is not definite.
whatever you say, i support you.anything i don't agree, i tell you from my different perspective.
that's me my friend.hope you can get it^^
Just Dance
guess what, i am facing the neck of bottle of my life right now.
1st thing: ignored
i was ignored these few months or days. don't know the exact reason why...maybe is because of my plumpish figure?(it could be one of the factors...)maybe it is my lame character?( actually i don't think i am lame at all) maybe i am too talkative?(but i think i am not beyond the line.)maybe i am too pushy.....in all things...i was ignored by lots of people who i wanted to share with.wanting to reconnect and rebond but still---- avail.
2nd thing:scolded
yes, scolding is one of the things i still get alot these few days.i know i am troublesome but i am trying to improve.whoever says when they look at me they have a stomach full of gas go and fart.dont keep it.but i am not going behind your back and take it all.i can analyse and make the truth out of it.please say the truth and don't add something useless in it.scolding is something i do not often but i don't keep it. being scolded is something i get it very very often but i keep the person who scolds me in my heart not the issue..(gosh, there must be something wrong with my analytical skill.)
3rd thing:stressed
i am very stressed for the time being. this plump sweet potato might be smiling all day but actually it is already full of wormholes in it.lots of thing coming and i cannot say it out loud.no no.i can keep it i can keep it i can keep it.then i become a bottle of secrets.when i break, ohno.... so don't break me up.have to talk with little voices these days. felt very uncomfortable.
4th thing:stacked
homework,responsibilities all stacked unorganisely in piles.picture it with me on top of it. cannot get down unless i finish it all... go, picture it.
listened to the song Just Dance, feel that my english is extremely bad 4 not knowing what Lady Gaga is singing except for the word just dance.
life is like a dance too.the music never stops for you.if you stop halfway you just make a fool out of yourself.finish the dance even you think it is humiliating.maybe people can see the potential out of you whether it is comedious, elegant or entertaining.go with the music, just dance.
1st thing: ignored
i was ignored these few months or days. don't know the exact reason why...maybe is because of my plumpish figure?(it could be one of the factors...)maybe it is my lame character?( actually i don't think i am lame at all) maybe i am too talkative?(but i think i am not beyond the line.)maybe i am too pushy.....in all things...i was ignored by lots of people who i wanted to share with.wanting to reconnect and rebond but still---- avail.
2nd thing:scolded
yes, scolding is one of the things i still get alot these few days.i know i am troublesome but i am trying to improve.whoever says when they look at me they have a stomach full of gas go and fart.dont keep it.but i am not going behind your back and take it all.i can analyse and make the truth out of it.please say the truth and don't add something useless in it.scolding is something i do not often but i don't keep it. being scolded is something i get it very very often but i keep the person who scolds me in my heart not the issue..(gosh, there must be something wrong with my analytical skill.)
3rd thing:stressed
i am very stressed for the time being. this plump sweet potato might be smiling all day but actually it is already full of wormholes in it.lots of thing coming and i cannot say it out loud.no no.i can keep it i can keep it i can keep it.then i become a bottle of secrets.when i break, ohno.... so don't break me up.have to talk with little voices these days. felt very uncomfortable.
4th thing:stacked
homework,responsibilities all stacked unorganisely in piles.picture it with me on top of it. cannot get down unless i finish it all... go, picture it.
listened to the song Just Dance, feel that my english is extremely bad 4 not knowing what Lady Gaga is singing except for the word just dance.
life is like a dance too.the music never stops for you.if you stop halfway you just make a fool out of yourself.finish the dance even you think it is humiliating.maybe people can see the potential out of you whether it is comedious, elegant or entertaining.go with the music, just dance.
2010年2月16日星期二
2010年2月15日星期一
i don't want to grow up...
there's a lump in my heart that i don't know how to express it out loud.
i am afraid of growing up...i don't want to be an adult...there is too much responsibilities waiting for me in the future.i don't know how to handle it and i am afraid i will make a mess out of it...i don't want to grow up...
there is a sorrow feeling that occured after everything i dreamed of comes to me.there wasnt the beautiful feeling that will come to me but fear that conquered me.... i don't want to grow up.i can't handle politics.i hate to do something that is fake but it needs to be done without me willing to do it.i don't want to smile to someone whom i really don't think he/she deserves a smile from me.i want a real face, no double masks hiding , shading from the light of truth.
there is fear in humans..fear of all truths..when there is a mistake and that is a truth, they can't take it.they accuse people of suspecting their abilities and so on.the world is not in peace.there is no trust between humans anymore.everyone fight like mad for power, fame, status and fonds...
i don't want to go in the world yet.maybe there is a place of peace, warmth and generosity yet there is still reality of faces with evil grins and sharp thinking racing all over the clock to beat down the best among the best.
the world is complicated.when i grow up, i will meet the whole of it, face to face.am i able to change it? am i going to strive in this evil force?
politics
friends
status
fame
luxury
academics
co curricular
self improvement
i am tired....
i am afraid of growing up...i don't want to be an adult...there is too much responsibilities waiting for me in the future.i don't know how to handle it and i am afraid i will make a mess out of it...i don't want to grow up...
there is a sorrow feeling that occured after everything i dreamed of comes to me.there wasnt the beautiful feeling that will come to me but fear that conquered me.... i don't want to grow up.i can't handle politics.i hate to do something that is fake but it needs to be done without me willing to do it.i don't want to smile to someone whom i really don't think he/she deserves a smile from me.i want a real face, no double masks hiding , shading from the light of truth.
there is fear in humans..fear of all truths..when there is a mistake and that is a truth, they can't take it.they accuse people of suspecting their abilities and so on.the world is not in peace.there is no trust between humans anymore.everyone fight like mad for power, fame, status and fonds...
i don't want to go in the world yet.maybe there is a place of peace, warmth and generosity yet there is still reality of faces with evil grins and sharp thinking racing all over the clock to beat down the best among the best.
the world is complicated.when i grow up, i will meet the whole of it, face to face.am i able to change it? am i going to strive in this evil force?
politics
friends
status
fame
luxury
academics
co curricular
self improvement
i am tired....
2010年1月31日星期日
ADDICTION
what is addiction?it doesn't goes away when u wanted it to go...and u wanted it very much...is that correct?
dunno, i feel i am addicted to something...maybe some of you might think it is about something else but i feel that it is not.that is strong and the reason i gave about my addiction is not the real one i think.
it pulls on me every single time i think of it..
it sticks on me whenever i go..
it stains my clear crystal heart with red kisses...
it is real beauty of that place, new zealand.
the people there are beautiful, their souls pure.
the scenery there is also very beautiful, with the waters clear.
i feel me looking into beautiful, crystal heart clear.
i am addicted.
to the food, people, weather,scenery...
missed there and home much.
addicted to the chocolates too...
fat person i am...
i am still addicted..
to something i would never know...
only my heart knows...
dunno, i feel i am addicted to something...maybe some of you might think it is about something else but i feel that it is not.that is strong and the reason i gave about my addiction is not the real one i think.
it pulls on me every single time i think of it..
it sticks on me whenever i go..
it stains my clear crystal heart with red kisses...
it is real beauty of that place, new zealand.
the people there are beautiful, their souls pure.
the scenery there is also very beautiful, with the waters clear.
i feel me looking into beautiful, crystal heart clear.
i am addicted.
to the food, people, weather,scenery...
missed there and home much.
addicted to the chocolates too...
fat person i am...
i am still addicted..
to something i would never know...
only my heart knows...
2010年1月16日星期六
new zealand n .....
new zealand.a word that makes people feel happy and also burdened.i understand that all success needs a hard process..but i feel extremely exhausted. luckily that i don't have much homework.hope i can strive through the next week.
today at school have marching.feel a bit depressed that i can't even make a simple command beautifully.and i keep making mistakes and shaking like mad in my voice. eventhough that not many ppl can hear it bt i know it myself.and i feel that my marching is getting worse...
something even worse happened and i really feel no mood after that.and i secretly have a plan going on, racing against time to plan it quick, for the sake of my bach, the bach filled with unknown future and unsecureness...
after meeting was a baju trying going on... once more felt pressured and depressed with the no-hope-of-finding-anymore-clothes-for-me feeling...wanted to cry but managed to keep it down, for its is still a long journey to go and i must be brave to fight against all odds.everyone says i am a lucky girl to go to nz and i am definitely not going to let all these people down.but i was still negativer thinking that i am sometimes somehow isolated....and i at last understood the meaning of "don't give yourself a chance to be abandoned."ok, even if everyone forget me i will try my best to shine.4 u to see haha...
the next thing in my mind is trying to form this board of meeting...duno how to start it yet but scared to make the wrong moves and make the pack of cards collapse...people before us had stacked it up nice and sturdy but a harsh move of us will damaged the whole monument...argh...i am not very positive about the meeting itself too actually... i know them too well...they only want what they want...what if no one supported me like last time? what if people say things about me?
what if they suddenly group themselves again?i really don't dare to think for i am to chicken.but i am NOT chicken...so what can i do?do all of you just threw away the thoughts and just straight away go do it? 4 1 thing i am sure about, WE DON'T GEL......so what can i do?give me some tips or lead me towards the right path, won't you?
today at school have marching.feel a bit depressed that i can't even make a simple command beautifully.and i keep making mistakes and shaking like mad in my voice. eventhough that not many ppl can hear it bt i know it myself.and i feel that my marching is getting worse...
something even worse happened and i really feel no mood after that.and i secretly have a plan going on, racing against time to plan it quick, for the sake of my bach, the bach filled with unknown future and unsecureness...
after meeting was a baju trying going on... once more felt pressured and depressed with the no-hope-of-finding-anymore-clothes-for-me feeling...wanted to cry but managed to keep it down, for its is still a long journey to go and i must be brave to fight against all odds.everyone says i am a lucky girl to go to nz and i am definitely not going to let all these people down.but i was still negativer thinking that i am sometimes somehow isolated....and i at last understood the meaning of "don't give yourself a chance to be abandoned."ok, even if everyone forget me i will try my best to shine.4 u to see haha...
the next thing in my mind is trying to form this board of meeting...duno how to start it yet but scared to make the wrong moves and make the pack of cards collapse...people before us had stacked it up nice and sturdy but a harsh move of us will damaged the whole monument...argh...i am not very positive about the meeting itself too actually... i know them too well...they only want what they want...what if no one supported me like last time? what if people say things about me?
what if they suddenly group themselves again?i really don't dare to think for i am to chicken.but i am NOT chicken...so what can i do?do all of you just threw away the thoughts and just straight away go do it? 4 1 thing i am sure about, WE DON'T GEL......so what can i do?give me some tips or lead me towards the right path, won't you?
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